Finding a dream

Begin doing what you want to do now.

We are not living in eternity. We have only this moment
sparkling like a star in our hand-- and melting like a snowflake.
Sir Francis Bacon

One of the things on which I am currently working, is dreams-- not the nighttime ones but daytime. A lot of what I have written in here recently has been part of-- trying to think of the right word-- finding my own dream again.

For much of my life, I have been one who has wanted and had a dream out in front of me. Dreams for me tend to be on the realistic side. I don't bother dreaming about something that cannot remotely happen. I also don't bother calling it a dream when it's something I could do with a little will power. For me, dreams require something greater to have happen, more than the usual effort from me and just a touch of magic.

A dream could be a place I might live, like that cabin. It would offer a lifestyle that went with it or a relationship that might supply something my life currently doesn't have. A dream would add spice and juice to my days that currently is not happening. Often a dream is out there with no clear way to get to it.

Acquiring a dream might not be as important as dreaming it. Some dreams would have likely been disasters if I had gotten them. My own dreams have been both fleeting and those that lasted for many years.

I am thinking maybe old age is part of my problem now. I am not sure what is going to be a realistic old age dream. When you are young, you can dream of raising your family in the wilderness, like the old film, The Wilderness Family, but that time has passed (a dream for me that didn't happen and probably just as well).

Dreams don't have to ever happen and sometimes I know they won't, but it's having one out there that helps me form bigger goals, that lends some magic to my days, hope to my future. For me right now, the dream space is a big blank. Blank spaces aren't really good. They tend to get filled with something but I want nothing in the dream space except another dream.

Above my desk are a lot of quotes, almost like Buddhist prayer flags but on post-its. Many relate to dreams:

Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined.
Thoreau

Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is a winged bird that cannot fly.
Langston Hughes

It may take years to realize a dream,
but dreaming itself is an elevating experience.
Maya Angelou

Dreams are necessary to life.
Anais Nin

and on they go but are they helping? Is the music helping? Are the movies helping? I am not sure yet; but I am working on it. I don't think this is about old age. We never get too old to dream; but currently, even my nighttime dreams are taking on a mundane-- fix a dinner, make sure everyone got fed, where does everyone sleep-- quality. I find myself going through the paces daytime or nighttime.

Nobody needs to feel sorry for me as my paces are pretty good. I had time last week-end with our son, daughter-in-law, and two of our grandchildren. It popped up without planning on a spur of the moment call from them, and it was a delightful time exploring an old flour mill which led to a lot of wonderful photographs. I am looking forward later this month to a time for the whole family, all ten of us, in Sunriver when we celebrate our Christmas. So it's not like I'm living a bleak existence-- unless you find having dreams important.

I could blame this on winter doldrums, but this is often my main dream building time as I redo my intentions for the coming year. The end of December and beginning of January tend to be when I think of what I most truly would want.

So if you see a lot of posts here about dreams, about inspiring ideas, about goals, you will know why. It's just me trying out various ideas (with a couple of political posts thrown in simply because I can't say no to everything happening right now). I am looking at ways to get a new dream, one that will work into in my elder years, and using tools that have helped in the past-- only this time sharing it here in the blog.

If you have ideas that help you (assuming a dream is important in your life), please add them into the comments-- or if it's extensive enough, email it to me (rainnnn7 at hotmail dot com) and I will post it here as its own subject.

(I don't know from where that sunset came (other than that it's my photo). Maybe its anonymous quality makes it a particularly good one for this subject. It was in the days when my photos were all with the Nikon 35mm and printed; so it's scanned. It might be at the Tucson house (a dream that came true but has led to its own problems as dreams have a way of doing).