the Cold Moon

 

 

End of a year and about to begin  new one. We pay attention to such because of calendars and the media buzz. The reality is it doesn't actually exist this way. Time goes on and when we split into some kind of meaning, that's human nature.

At one time I would do goal statements during the time between Christmas and New Years. I got pretty sophisticated with them with sections for spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical goals. I am not sure when I stopped but mostly because I was writing a lot of the same things every year. Did that have meaning or help me change anything? Apparently not but it had some satisfaction attached to it-- until it didn't.

Now, this is just a quiet time and I appreciate that also. I have goals but don't need to write them down as I may not do much about them. They are in my head and heart.

I never called them resolutions and don't know why. For now, it's enough to know what is in my head/heart. I hope this new year will be good for the world but right now that doesn't seem encouraging. Some say don't read the newspapers or online news, but I do want to know. I'd be happier if I didn't but it's not been my way and being ignorant of what is happening has never been my way.

Do you ever think that the brightest things in our night skies, planets and the moon, have no light of their own. They are all reflecting of the sun, our star. We can be that way too with what we reflect based on what we have received.

For this blog, I have hopes that I can write meaningful posts. I have read blogs are 'out' but I don't really care. I do it for connection with whoever reads my thoughts, whether they comment or not. I had years where I got  lot of comments. These days, I mostly see none, but I know people have been here, from around the world. Whether they read, that I don't know *s*

The Beckoning Flame is reduced until the New Year when it'll go up to its regular price of $4.99 due to its length.

 Many people don't want to read long books, but I believe this one has a lot to offer and is easy to break into sections to read since it takes place over about 6 months in three characters' lives in Arizona. I love the book and its title as I think flames beckon us all one way or the other. Is it always good? That's for us to find out. As we will with this new year.

https://www.amazon.com/the%20beckoning%20flame-Winds-Change-ebook/dp/B0CQGR6N3B/

'Tis the Season

 Tis the Season

From our house to yours, best wishes
 

Finally, here's some music, from old to new take, which I love and hope you will too. You do have to get past ads but once you do, I think you'll find it as powerful as I do.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GbHyghmxeeM

Bonus post and a sale

 Sale on a new book that arrives tomorrow, and today is on preorder. It's part of the series of Arizona romances that was pulled a year ago for editing, new titles, and some extended endings. So, new, only by the rules. But it is kind of new. It came out first as Tucson Moon, then the Marshal's Lady. No tittle really worked for the theme of the book. I believe this one does and it will be permanent. 

Does the flame that beckons to us burn or enlighten our lives?

Because it is new and this is the Christmas season, it's on sale for 6 days or so, depending on when we get around to changing it.

The main characters, romantic protagonists and villain, were in the first book, Beyond the Broken Road. Although it might seem Priscilla and Cord aren't on a broken road as were Sam and Abigail, in a way their roads were equally not right for their eventual goals. Throw in Christmas and an estranged daughter, later a movement of nature, and you have the essence of The Beckoning Flame.

My novels are longer than many, with twists and nuances, but they are what I enjoy writing and hope readers will equally enjoy.

Happy Holidays however you celebrate them, and hope you enjoy this book if you check it out and buy it before its price goes to $4.99. It is also wide and available for other senders, but no paperback yet. That is still to come. It's been a busy season here.

https://www.amazon.com/the%20beckoning%20flame-Winds-Change-ebook/dp/B0CQGR6N3B/

A culture's impact

 

While I should be concentrating on the next book coming out, from a series of eight, my real thinking is how the culture in which my characters lived impacted them. That's not very romancey , but it is what has driven all of my books (30 so far) as I set them into a situation where romance is important, relationships matter a lot, but also into their cultural time frame. For some people, the culture in their world works fine for them. What about when it does not?

Book 1, which is already out, Beyond the Broken Road, is about the couple, but also what is the broken road for them. We are born into a time and often that culture either helps or damages our next choices as we reach the age for such options.

To me, the broken road is a broken culture for these lead characters. It's the the other side of what could be, but often is not, for those, growing up in the same time span. I could go into that for our time, but the book, and those to come, are not about our time-- though we do bring our own insights to it. 

For Sam and Abigail in Beyond the Broken Road, both are much impacted by their culture but in very different ways, which does not make the road less broken.

This book begins with showing the difference between the two sides of one culture. Abigail is standing outside the office where she works. She is feeling stifled by the world in which she lives. She hears raucous laughter from the down the street where the freedom seems greater. Then a man rides out on a powerful horse, showing all the power she had never felt over her own life. To her shock, he stops to watch her for a long moment. She wonders what he sees but has no way to know. When he rides on, she is left with the lack of freedom she feels.

That's just the first chapter with two people with no clue what the other side of a current cultural set of norms means for their lives. The book is about what they find.

Each of my books and that means even the contemporary look at this cultural divide, which I think is still a big thing today. 

 If a book with more than a hot romance is of interest, it's the book for you to explore. It's not simple with how life outside of ourselves can impact us. But I believe it is reality and to get the life we want, we need to be aware of those outside influences. 

Second book comes out the 19th, with different problems, but no less a cultural divide. I'll link to it here when it's live. These books are both wide but no paperbacks yet.

Beyond the Broken Road

Series writing

 When I first wrote Sam and Abigail's Arizona story, i had no thought of it expanding to a series of so far eight books. I enjoy reading series books-- if the writers don't keep on them too long. By too long, I mean, with no new stories and purely a desire to keep the series going. It can end up boring.

With my first book in what did become a series, I liked the characters a lot and was attracted to a secondary character of the federal marshal, Cord O' Brian. But, if he was to be a hero, who was the heroine? It seemed obvious when I thought about it-- Abigail's friend, Priscilla. A marshal and a rich woman? Unlikely combination. Perfect for romances. They had a lot to overcome and the second book virtually wrote itself as a villain was already in it from that first book. 

 

The second book in the Winds of Change series will be out ( 12/19) before the end of the month. That's even better as Christmas plays a big part in the story. The link will be here when it is.

One thing about series is, for me, they often don't appear with the first book. That was true with my Oregon series where it began with the trip west and a young couple. The fun for writers and readers is when we like secondary characters, why not want to know their stories also. That is how interesting series are born-- whether in a locale, friends, or with families.

Titles of books

 Some who write books, have titles in mind from the start. I almost never do. I often change my mind on possible titles before the book comes out. Those are the lucky times. For my Oregon historical romances, their first published titles worked and continue to work for me. That happens sometimes but not always.

The Arizona historical romances have been less fortunate. I started out looking for a title for the first one after it was written. Keep in mind that marketing is in the essence of what titles and covers are about. Finding a title and yes cover that work for a trope is what helps to find readers.

What should a title say about the book? Something about the theme, maybe the characters, or the essence of the story. Location works for some books as it might be central to the rest of what happens. What about when it's not?

With the book that had its first title as Arizona Sunset. I thought not only did it give the location but also the possible dire end of a life through the plot. Of course, since it was a romance, not a love story, that dire end wasn't really possible. That book went through assorted other title possibilities and nothing really dealt with the story itself. Nothing worked for readers or even me. When we got to the last one, Impulse, it was the biggest failure. Yes, impulses were important to the impetus behind what happened, but what did that tell a reader?

I've written before about what we went through once we found out that we could not again change titles, due to rule changes. What it led to was pulling the series, and a full year of working on how to bring the books out again, as I still love the stories and their characters. These books were set in Arizona and related to each other, with some characters carrying through them. Sam, hero of the first book, was such a strong character that he ended up in most of them as a secondary character.

For me, as a writer, this year probably didn't look like much was happening, but it was. Not so much the plots or characters but editing to improve the writing (something most authors will have happen if they keep writing).

The question remained, what title would give these two protagonists a fair exposure to what their journey was about. Then we came with the concept, both were on broken roads, going where they did not want to go. What changes that trajectory was bringing their energies together. It's not just a broken road but what can come beyond it. 

This title worked, at least for me. It better, as I will try never to change another title given all we went through with this one. Although, I have learned a lot about those books and what the titles meant for their journey.

Available for Amazon at https://www.amazon.com/Beyond-Broken-Road-Winds-Change-ebook/dp/B0CMZ2F29L ,

Plus universal distribution at  UBL: https://book2read.com/u/4jED5o

If you read the book, consider leaving a review, as it lost them all when being pulled and republished. Reviews mean a lot to other readers to help them decide on what to read next.  They are also good for the writers *s*

Thinking too much

saguaro that dies on our property for no reason we know

 One of the things that came to me, as I began thinking about what I'd learned through aging, was that for every positive, there is a negative. I guess that's not unique to figure out *what you sow you shall reap or yin and yang, but it has personal implications for me.

Think of the word gratitude. It's what we emphasize with the recent Thanksgiving celebration. What can we appreciate in our lives. Generally, it's what happened in our lives or today where we feel glad. But what about the other side. We look at the recent times where gangs to into stores and grab what they can. One side says-- it's reparations for past wrongs-- not to those people but others. The other side says that tears apart the fabric of society. Fix these wrongs legally. One side claims there is no legally. Except, if not, what is left.

I took this more personally for myself. From the time I was a child, I was told that I think too much. I have seen that as a positive as it's led to books and my own ability to look at what happens and see two sides.  Sounds good up until I think about my anxiety attacks where in the middle of the night I think of what I should have done better with many old inter-reactions with many people.  What good does it do to think about what I might have done better even when I know it's true. It's past and thinking about it gains nothing.

For every positive, I think there are negative aspects. What can we do about that? Wish I knew *s*. I would help with my anxiety attacks. I refuse to give up thinking, with the help of drugs. I'd rather put up with the yah and the nah. 

thanksgiving

 It's Thanksgiving Day in the United States based on a supposed historic event. It's more important than that, however, as it's a day of food, family and friends, a day to be thankful and appreciate what we have (not fuss over what we wish we had). That can be celebrated everywhere. 

Not just for this year, but the years past and those we have loved but have gone on. Happy thanksgiving day. Feelings of gratitude are important for all of life. Even for those with great losses, there are always some flickers of light that can be drawn up to enrich the current days. It just takes being aware.

 

 

Old Age and changes

  

Writing about old age seemed so simple when I thought it was time I addressed it, since I am old. It wasn't so easy, as I began to think of various angles to being old--- not just mine. I put off writing this until the time came when I had to do or it'd not happen, and I had said I would...

The photo above was taken about six months or so before I turned 80. The cat on my printer died not long after. It is with them as it is with us as we age except I don't think they know what aging means as we do. They know they can't do what they once did but not what that means-- or so we think. We know what their death means for us and just hope they have easy time as they cross over.... cross over to what? We have different opinions on that as we do on aging itself.

Not all days does my hair look like that photo. I choose a good hair day as hair is important to us-- male and female. About the time I turned 60, I decided to let my hair go natural. I also decided I would continue to wear it long as I have always liked the feel of long hair. I used to enjoy going to salons for cuts and perms, but didn't want to continue doing that. Long hair simplifies it as I can cut it myself.

So, what are the things about old age that mean I can't do what I once did? One of them is having good balance, hiking or running. I know some have these things but generally because they have to exercise in ways that they needed-- and that's because they aren't younger when it used to be easier.

I mentioned in the previous blog on Aging that I think there are three main life ages. One is youth, which begins with birth. When does it end? Well, likely that's different for most of us. I saw youth behind me when I was in my mid-20s, asked my husband to my legs still look as they used to and he said not so much lol. Don't ask your husband such questions if you don't want the truth. I had lost the roundness of youth. My knees looked different than when a teen, and why not-- I'd had two babies by then.

But after leaving youth behind, with a wistful feel, I entered what I call middle age. For most of us our 30s are actually our strongest years. I thought I was my prettiest then, not that it immediately changed. Middle years are less defined that the growing up years. I think they probably vary for when they end, based on health and other conditions. For me, they sailed by with my 50s, 60s, and into my 70s, as I ,noticed real little change, subtle ones but nothing major.

Then, came my 80s, this year and I accepted, as I had once left behind youth. This was leaving behind middle years for a whole new territory. Old age. I had seen changes along the way like what foods i could eat without consequences, my ability to walk distances, enjoying my photos or even looking in a mirror (where I suddenly looked like one of my aunts-- when did that happen?). I know for some that happens in their 60s but for me not so much as my 70s. Still, though I knew a newspaper would call me elderly if something bad happened, I didn't really feel it. I do now.

What does that mean? There are physical changes where I am not as steady as I once was. I have times I need to put my hands against something solid to feel okay. I fell once in the kitchen when I just crumpled to the ground, with no clue why it happened except I had changed positions from my head down and then arms up as I turned. 

Even more troubling is that I can no longer easily get up from the floor and need something to hold onto. My familial tremors have gotten worse, which complicates many things. I expected this since I had seen my aunt when her head would shake. What I didn't know until recently was that tremors get worse with age.These aren't big things but they are inconvenient. 

When I tried to walk into our vacation trailer, the top step was beyond my ability. I had to sit down to kind of scoot in. That was easy two years ago. 

Unsteadiness is a big deal for me, but it's a reality also that I must accept. Yes, I maybe could do exercises to improve it. I tried that but still just not what it once was.

When I had my last physical, I had lost two inches since being a young adult. Since I don't have arthritis, or not enough to be troubling, I am not sure what that is, Having fallen a few times for assorted reasons, nothing broke, so I am figuring not osteoporosis-- or not much as last tests found that okay.

I do find it harder to remember names sometimes and always wonder-- what is that? When they finally come to me, I wonder why they hadn't. Some say that's normal old age. Maybe storing too much information *s*.

I do more thinking about an unknown future. Anyone knows that our 80s can be a time of more health problems. Other than what I know about family, I don't know what to expect. As with many old folks, death isn't scary to me but it's how I get there that gives me concern. A long illness? Something that impacts my mind?

There are pluses though to getting to experience old age. One is an abundance of memories. I know of those who wish they could still do what they once did. I don't feel that so much as glad I do have those memories and they are rich for me. I did what I wanted to do then and have no regrets that it wasn't otherwise. I have to let that go and look toward what is possible.

Having experienced a wide span of activities, all ones I chose not because i must but because I wanted, my perspective is greater than someone with less memories of what once was not only in ourselves but our culture.

The one thing I can say about old age is, those of us fortunate enough to get here, we must be open to change. It's coming as it did when we grew from children to adults.

For now, my husband and I are blessed to be going through this adventure together as we both turned 80 this year. There is no alternative but to embrace and find new things that make us feel our days are worthwhile. Those won't be the same for all who turn 80-- again, it's about change. In this photo, because he's on his knees behind me, he looks smaller but he's still 6' or so and I'm 5'5" (which irks me as I liked feeling taller-- stretch as I might, I am not getting there).

 

newsletters

 

Alongside here is what is supposed to be a signup for my newsletter. There have been some complications in that I hadn't sent one for too long (by Mail Chimp's standards) about which, I can't disagree. Because I hadn't had a new book out, and there were assorted reasons for that, I don't send the newsletter, as its intention is not to spam people but only when a new work is coming or a price change. 

When we went to get Mail Chimp going, we got an out of service notice or something like that. Well, that is now working, but there are some new requirements begun by the EU and spreading here to protect those who might find themselves signed up when they didn't want to be. That meant previous addresses had been lost. Mail Chimp promises they don't sell their list or keep it long. I hope that's true as it is what is best for clients.

If you find it of interest to know more about new, Rain Trueax books, check the link out. It's at the top of the column. I am sometimes reluctant to mention new books here as not all of those who read this blog care about my writing. 

The new books always appear in the links alongside here with their images but only those that go to Amazon. The ones coming next will be historical and they always go wide.

Anyway, the joys of the internet, which we need but can be frustrating at the same time. *s* 

If you have questions regarding this, feel free to email me; and my address is in my profile

Aging

 

When speaking of aging, I need to begin where it begins with the miracle of life. I call it a miracle because we can't fully understand how it works. We just know it does. I still think of holding my own babies when they were born and knowing they would grow and change with the years.

It sometimes does not work that way but mostly, it does. It is still hard for me to grasp than when they were so tiny, they would grow into who they became. It is life itself and amazing.

I also remember some of my early years but mostly that comes from photographs. As I grew into a child, I remember things I did or saw. I didn't think of myself as an age though. There are times that stand out, like turning 16 and getting a driver's license. Those are mandated by a culture more than our own aging experience. Another big one back then was voting age which was 21 at that time. Again, a culture change more than by our bodies.

Bodily and emotionally, with our growth, came many changes. We go from youth to what could be called middle age or middle years. Once we reach that stage of life, things don't appear to change as much as far as the body goes. We learn, we experience, emotionally and spiritually, we may go through many changes. But middle years continue for a long time. 

In my opinion, our middle years stay physically much the same. There are no gigantic changes as we experienced from babyhood to childhood to those teen years. It's hard to say when youth ends and the middle years begin. They begin as we take on many different roles, but in essence, not so much unless we have health issues. Some of those are a product of our DNA, part about our choices. 

Then, comes a major biological change due to aging. It comes at different times for us based on those earlier choices or from what we were born. It's not the same for us all, as many earlier changes also are. Next blog on my experience with that stage of life, where I have found myself..

Needed distractions sometimes

 In a time where we might find ourselves on the brink of a third world war, when we discover there is so much hatred in the world for one ethnic group, and yes, i mean Jews, where most of us thought a civilized world was far beyond such thinking where it comes to bigotry. The worst being how it has shown up on our major university campuses, it's hard not to be really depressed.

If we think those wars will be far from us-- there are reasons to believe that is not true. One, many of us have offspring of an age to be called up as happened in previous wars; but with a frighteningly open border, there could be many who have entered our countries with not the purest of purposes.

What do we do? Well be informed is important but not to a ghoulish fascination; but  we need to be aware and that means around the world. So much of the violence that strikes is random. Being aware of our surroundings and world is key.

Sometimes, however, we need to look for ways to uplift ourselves. For me, I found one with this article on a creative painter I have long admired as it goes into her life with what I considered to be an uplifting documentary of Georgia O'keeffe. If you have liked her work and read all the books you could find on her life, you won't find a lot new in the video. If you have never heard of her, I think you'll find a good exploration into a creative life.

It is about an hour long and takes you to a different time and place. I hope you will give it a try.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DMMWaGm4jU

I will post next week on the subject of aging with my thoughts on it as I see it in my own life. I want some time to think more deeply on it. After all, it is the one given in life. We do age

Samhain

 Because next week is the day many call Halloween, but a time with a much older origin, Samhain, I thought it a good time to show how such times can be used in books. This snippet comes from the Oregon historical, Love Waits. It is not a big part of the plot but rather about the family and from where they came, how they saw things. 

Jed, who tells this story is from a Scottish heritage family, who first settled in Georgia, after Culloden, which was a big thing in Scottish history and why many decided to immigrate elsewhere. Although the tale is supposed to be from Georgia, the history of ghost tales goes back to his Scottish ancestors. It's just one example of how such traditions are carried on and then can be used by a writer. As you read such a brief sample, you won't know who these characters are but maybe can tell from what they say. 

The point of view is from the hero of this fourth in the Oregon series even though the traditions come from Jed (hero of the third) and the one telling the story to the family. The following image is from Stencil and not in the book (although there is a cat referred to) but this picture fits Halloween. *s*

 

“I heard these stories as a small one,” the tall southerner drawled as he rose and began to lower the lamps until the room was barely lit. The moon outside was rising but it was a crescent that provided little light.

“The stories I was told come from the swamps and cypress forests of Georgia and the home of Two-Toed Tom.” He moved around the room as he described a home where many generations had lived and where a ghost was determined to keep for himself.

“Do any of you know what a ghost looks like?” he asked with a smile as he scanned over the children.

“Ugly?” Rufus suggested.

“Like you maybe,” Eli added with a grin as he gave his nephew a light punch on his arm. Rufus responded with a giggle.

“For those who have seen ghosts… or claimed they did,” Jed said, “they don’t agree. And most folks don’t see them at all. They just see what they do when they break something or make noises intended to scare people.”

His story took the side of the ghost. He created sympathy of the poor ghost who only wanted to keep his home from intruders. Rand saw it took the fear from it but not the excitement as the children listened with rapt attention. With the ghost’s great disappointment in failing to scare anyone, the sorrow all fell upon the poor trapped ghost failing in his assigned task.

“And then one brave little girl confronted the ghost and made him show himself.”

“Oh yeah, like it would be a girl,” Rufus protested with a low growl.

“Did the ghost hurt her?” Laura asked, ignoring her brother’s insult as she cuddled her little sister to her. Jessica had from the beginning sought comfort on Belle’s lap.

“No, he was glad she saw him. He felt less lonely when she asked him what he needed. She told him they would not be scared; so he should do all that he needed to be happy. ‘I just want someone to hear my story,’ the ghost cried.

“’Let it be me,’ she said as she then sat and listened as he told her of his life, how he had come to be where he was. After she heard it all, he smiled and vanished, never to be seen again.”

“He should have killed someone,” Rufus suggested. “What kind of ghost is that?”

“Killing isn’t good,” Jeremy disagreed. His face grew somber. “I wonder if my mother is a ghost.”

“This is the time when the other side is very close to us,” said Jed. “It is a time to ask for stories, ours or those from the other side.”

“Now?” The little boy’s expression grew worried.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Raine asked as she nudged Jed’s shoulder.

“Of course, because we are all here to be together and make it not scary. What is your mother’s name, Jeremy?”

Rand had little belief in another side and wondered if Jed did. The boy looked uneasy as he considered the request. “My father never told me. And I was pretty little when she left.”

“What did she look like?” Belle asked tenderly brushing the hair back from Jessica’s forehead.

“Like my sister. She had red hair. It was curly and pretty. She was beautiful.”

Rand wondered if he could get more information on the missing mother when he got back to the fort. More likely, it would take his next trip to The Dalles and the telegraph to get to those who might have such records for the Foresters.

“Where did you live, Jer?” Rand asked remembering the preferred nickname.

“Virginia and then California.”

“Well, let’s see if any ghosts want to talk to us,” Jed said as he took a seat at the dark end of the room.

“Being scared does not seem a good idea before bed,” Raine again reminded him.

“It’s not scary to talk to the other side,” Jed corrected her. “They are like my story not scary. They just want us to listen.”

“You sound like you believe in ghosts,” Adam said with a skeptical tone.

“Of course. I am a southerner,” Jed said with a smile. “Now let’s just listen and when we listen, whatever we hear, we will tell each other. Deal?”

Rand had no real belief in anything, certainly not that his mother might try to reach out to him from across a mysterious divide. Still he didn’t try to ruin Jed’s celebration of Samhain. He glanced again at Belle as she comforted the little girl. She would make a loving mother. That thought gave him no pleasure. If she was pregnant, it was clear she would shut him away from their baby.

It was his own damned fault for making love to her before he had the right. If he could have, he’d have kicked himself. He ruined it for them both. Twice maybe. How would their life have been if they had married when she had wanted when she was so young?

He had been right back then though. He knew it. If she was rejecting him now, likely she would have eventually left him. What could the military offer a woman like her that she could not find better with another? He would work to be a friend to her, to support her as best he could for as long as he lived. He would do likewise for any child if one happened to be on its way.

When no one reported any sightings of ghosts, Jed brought out his guitar. “Some of these were African folk songs that I grew up hearing.”

Jed’s voice was on pitch, deep and soulful. He brought intensity and a deep meaning to each song. He concluded with one that Rand had heard during the war—Aura Lee. A song of a man in love with a golden haired woman. It might have been Belle.

Finally, Jed stopped and said, “When we sleep tonight, remember your dreams. In the morning be sure we all share them.” With that, the children were taken off to bed by Belle and Amy. Raine, responding to the wail from their baby, left to feed him and then go to their own bedchamber. “I should also head for bed, Martha said. “Heaven likely is feeling very deserted. “She pulled on Adam’s arm to head for their cabin.