by Rain Trueax
We are in a new year and it's a time when many make resolutions or create vision or storyboards for what they want the year to look like. For many, 2020 was a year that seemed to destroy dreams. How do we plan what we want with a pandemic raging? Will some who lost their jobs with lock-downs ever get them back? What will happen as the political agendas change? It's unknown territory and mostly out of our control. Shouldn't we concentrate instead on our personal lives? Can't we figure out what we want, decide if what we have in our life suits us?
For some, who live long enough, we have to rework who we are again and again in life. When we are children, parents and society control a lot of our lives. Then we become adults and can make choices-- if we can afford them. Along comes middle age. Did we do what we wanted? Can we change it? There are choices of having children or not, careers, home locations, religions, politics, and on it goes.
In 2000, I wrote what I saw as my ideal day. The idea was focus on it and you will get it. Christ taught to believe and you will receive. A popular book, The Secret, came along later with much the same view. I recently looked back on that ideal day of 20 years ago and thought-- why didn't I get it? Would it have been the wrong thing for my life?
Part of it was a reality already. I painted and sculpted and wrote. At that time, being an indie writer wasn't a possibility but as soon as that opened up in 2012, for me, I went for it. I purposely left the name of the man out that day, as it was the relationship, not the name that mattered. The woman friend likewise represented my desire to have female friends in my life. It mattered their interests but not who they were.
The life I have today is very different, but maybe it's what I couldn't have imagined all those years ago. As an old woman, can I re-imagine again a different one ahead? That's the magic of life-- we don't know. (I should add it wouldn't be that one from 20 years ago. Different ages lead to different dreams).
