by Diane: Update # 18; How Covid 19, caregiving, and my art escape are changing me

 Monday, May 25, first thing in the morning, I painted for a few minutes. Finishing a painting takes the longest. For days  many times a day I kept glancing at the painting hanging in our dining area.  Often I looked outside at the swallows in flight. Questions came to mind.  Watching swallows, I saw the closest ones taking up more of my field of vision and their swift flight is more blurred than ones flying farther away. Same as a  picture's surface the closest swallows would be more blurred if I painted exactly what I see. But should I paint what is counter to  the identifiable detail that the viewer expects in the foreground?
          My idea for continued work on this painting  is to turn the front swallow back into the painting. I am concerned about the beginning and ending of their flight and would like to make their flight more circular and continuous like I observe.
           Questioning improves my enjoyment of observing and learning.  Makes me feel more alive. 
          The Covid 19 self quarantine reduces some of the distractions in life so focusing on  what is around our home is proving far more fascinating than I used to think it was.
         Tuesday I made the closest swallow more contrasty and it's path transparent to express speed. I do not worry about overworking the painting. With Covid-19 and my husband's health, I foresee a time when I will need to move. More than ever I want to tie my body of work into a meaningful whole. I am slow to use the new aquaboards that arrived from Blick's catalog on line.

          Fisherman Hubby's blurred vision and shakiness was found to be low sodium according to the ER on Wednesday, May 13. He received a hydrating IV. 
           It hurts to see Fisherman Hubby either too cold or too hot because his body doesn't regulate temperature. While watching television he allows his head to drop down every half minute. Also see his shoulders jerk. His hands are less steady and he talks me into typing for him.
         Gaiter Aid is helping but still he feels that his ALS is worsening. What gardening he could do in one session the first week of May now takes three sessions. Tuesday our 2020 high school graduate Grandson mowed the grass, sprayed poison on the weeds, and removed three upright stepping stones that served as the cement dragon's back because they were a  tripping hazard for me.
         I am, also, doing more gardening which has always been a parnership thing Hubby.  Now gardening has moved from a small part of our  togetherness to our major connection we share.
       On Friday Fisherman Hubby received his Tobindynavox Ipad that will serve as a speech generating devise. If necessry it can be eye activated. It has canned conversation in files like "Can we watch a movie?" "I am not intoxicated. I have a neuro motor disease."  "You do not have to talk to me like that. My ears are fine and I can comprehend like a normal adult." Maybe when he starts feeling better he will take an interest in it.
      We were so lucky that when it arrived Friday afternoon one daughter happened to be here to help with the set up. We are so thankful for the care our daughters have for us. Plus we appreciate all those friends who also do errands for us.

      The painting is first a landscape and then there are birds flying through. I want the painting to be swallows flying in a landscape atmosphere. On a warm day a rain shower is followed by hatches of flying insects.
      I am hesitant and not sure of my next step in painting so I wanted to do some pruning.

                 The first of three wheelbarrow loads of trimmingsoff the rhodadendron!

             The next job will be to prune back the Fall crocus leaves and the forget-me-not.
It is good to feel the Fisherman Hubby sharing the satisfaction of making beauty together in our garden.