When you reach a certain age, which could vary for any of us, the idea of end of life comes into play. I mean at 75, I obviously have a lot less years ahead than I've lived. What does that make for my choices, how I spend my money, home, pets, livelihood, etc.? How do I arrange for what I leave behind? How do I want to spend those years?
Well, for one thing, recently this meant updating our wills. We have had three wills. The first one was when we had our first child and wanted to assure ourselves who would care for her if we both died and be sure she or any future children inherited what we had. We went to a lawyer for that one because custody is a big deal, and we didn't want any question of its authenticity.
The second, many years later, involved using an internet app for what had to be in it. We needed to make sure my mother, who lived on our property would be looked after. Our children, who would be our heirs, were on their own and no longer an issue. We had it notarized and stuck it into the important papers folder.
The most recent one related to figuring out our assets and who got what. Our assets are complicated, but we only have two kids to inherit since i have long been opposed to leaving money to youths. The complicated part was two properties, investments, personal property, animals. We ended up deciding on the properties but left the personal items up to them. The investments would be equally divided. By the time it becomes an issue, it might've changed. Once we had it written out, we wanted to have it notarized, but it was more complicated than with the second will.
It turns out in our state, banks don't do it anymore, which seems crazy. They claim they will notarize a lot of legal documents but not wills. Their issue is what if it's contested. Well, notarizing it is simply to establish we signed it and looked to be of sound mind. We finally found a law office in a nearby town and that was that. If we live a lot more years, this all might again have to be reassessed.
When you reach a certain age, you assume that you don't have a LOT of quality years ahead, but you just don't know. Our only real dependents now are our cats. That worried me. Some are older but one might well outlive me. We had put that into the will that they go with the farm. I think if I lost any of the four, I'd still adopt a new cat but an older one.
Then, there comes our lifestyle options, and we tentatively came up with something that feels right. We plan to sell our travel trailer and get a fifth wheel which will offer more living space. The travel trailer was more about camping. The fifth wheel would be about living in it, traveling in it for maybe five months of the year. Some of it would be parking at the farm where we'd still be involved with the livestock. Some of it would be in our second home in Arizona where the farm would be looked after by our son. Since we don't want to sell the farm, where we want it to stay in the family, only one person is in a situation to take it over-- our son. We will rent or lease it to him when he's ready.
When we bought the farm, it was for a life we wanted for our kids as much as us. Our daughter was 11 and our son 8. There is a story that goes with the day our acquiring it began. We were looking in the area we thought was possible for the new job Ranch Boss would be taking. We stopped at a farm house to ask if they knew of any local property for sale. Our son was thirsty and asked for water. The mother and daughter, both old ladies, thought that was cute. They said they'd ask around. A few days later we got a phone call from the woman who owned the place we then bought. In many ways that day, our son was an instrument of us owning what we have for 40 years. So it makes total sense if he someday inherits it and maybe then someday one of his sons.
The idea of our living in an RV for part of the year has appeal. We have to move what had been my mother's motor home off the land, but we could then put a landing pad there, a fenced yard and patio for the cats, maybe with a carport for the part of the year we'd be there. If we can do it, we'd like to keep our legal and voting residence in Oregon. Some of that though may have to be resolved with a lawyer. It can get complicated.
The advantage of the Arizona home for say 5 months of the year would be it's closer to doctors, dentists, stores, restaurants, hiking trails, etc. Where we live in Oregon all of that is 25 miles away. The bad part is living farther from our kids but maybe we could attract them to visit Arizona more often.
I can write anywhere. My husband always finds work to do wherever he spends time. Living part of the year in Oregon, part of the year on the road, and part of the year in Arizona will only work as long as we are healthy. That's the unknown factor as you age.
Anyway, that's the current stuff we are working through in terms of lifestyle for the next say 10 or more years. Those photos are all from January's super wolf moon and the eclipse.
There is another issue to getting this old-- death. I'll write about it next blog.
8 comments:
We had our will reviewed when we moved here 12 years ago. My son who is younger than my daughter is upset that she has the authority to implement the will. She is more responsible and has a job working with many lawyers and law firms, so I am going to keep it. The will says that everything is divided evenly. We just have stocks and the house and the personal stuff. Should not be a problem, but you never know.
We have our son also as executor because he's closest and our daughter has a business she runs for her husband the veterinarian. We aren't doing a trust yet and don't know if we ever will. I think they'll be fine with settling it. Some families through break up over inheritances. Sad
Rain, I enjoy your perceptions and candor every week, thank you.
You didn't mention selling your Tucson home after buying a Fifth Wheel. Last winter, in Ajo, I met a woman at the laundromat from Idaho. She and her husband were closing that day on a house for their winter home, after years of staying in their Fifth Wheel at an RV park south of town. She explained her husband was having health issues and was finding it more difficult to manage the physical aspects of owning and towing a trailer. She seemed to be around 80, although I didn't learn her age. My parents went through the same process around 80: buying a park model and selling their RV.
As a cat lover, I know how you feel about your cats. When our last cat died, after 17 years of daily companionship, my grief was equal or greater than when my parents died. We did not get a new cat as I didn't want to travel with one (we own a Fifth Wheel). We have met a few RVers with cats, but not many. You may have to choose, in the future, between your cats and travel to your winter home.
We live in a rural area outside of Portland, but just two miles from the urban growth boundary. We are 8 miles from our doctor and hospital. Our son lives outside of Cave Junction, 38 miles from Grants Pass. Having the experience of driving that distance between his rural home and the nearest health care center in Grants Pass, I am keenly aware of how important transportation is, whenever I start dreaming of moving to a more quiet, less urban, remote location.
We aren't selling the Tucson house, William. It will likely be where we live half the year with part of it on the Oregon farm and maybe some traveling. We are uncertain of the logistics but we really love this Tucson house.
Our cats travel well but I think they'll do better with a bigger rig as more separation. What they miss is being outside. They only get access to fenced yards but they like being out. Tucson is especially popular with them as they roll in the sandy soil and come in filthy.
Thanks for commenting :)
It sounds like you have a plan that works for your life style.
I have been working on my plans, I want to do some traveling with the little travel trailer. But for now I am needed here til my granddaughter graduates from high school.
After that I hope to hit the road... yeehaw!
My daughter has been my designated executor for my meager holdings for quite some time. She is good with that, and so am I.
Well, we'll see if we have a plan. Right now it's about getting the deteriorating parts of the Tucson home fixed up. Our son is doing well with the livestock, something that makes this all possible and not that easy for those who don't know. He likes the cattle but not the sheep lol. I think it's because they are pushy... and of course, he thinks not smart
Interesting thoughts! This sort of planning is something I'll eventually have to deal with, but I'm ten years younger than you are, and can still afford to procrastinate. BTW, I have fond memories of the time,some years ago, when Bev and I stayed in your Tucson house.
That's good and yes, I totally see that. A person has this feeling that old age won't come lol and then suddenly, there it is. I am amazed at how much it changed from late 60s to where I am
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