Oregon writer, Rain Trueax, and Oregon painter, Diane Widler Wenzel co-author Rainy Day Thought. Diane generally posts on Wednesdays and Rain on Saturdays. There may be extra days or changes as situations warrant. Comments are always welcome and appreciated as it turns an article into a discussion.

Wednesday, March 09, 2016

Introverts and Extroverts

Most likely I have mentioned this more than once. I am an introvert. For those unfamiliar with the term, introverts are not necessarily shy. Even extroverts can be shy. Shy means being reserved and having or showing nervousness and timidity in the company of other people. I am not sure if shyness is taught by experience or part of an inherent nature. An extrovert, who is shy, has more problems than an introvert who is. The terms only relate to from where we get our energy. 

Extroverts get their energy from people. They need to be around people and feel energized in groups.

Introverts get their energy from being alone. They need to recharge after time in groups.
I got those a few years ago and think they're illustrative of at least part of being an introvert or extrovert. I would guess it is possible to not be all one or the other. Perhaps some go through stages with each. I don't know, but I've always been an introvert.

As to why someone is an introvert or extrovert, who knows. It is what it is.  To me, the big thing is figuring out who we are, how we recharge and not apologizing for it. But, you know in life, sometimes we have to step out of a comfort zone and move into regions that are not so comfortable. There can be many reasons for the shift; but when we know ourselves, we will take time as quickly as we can to get to where we can build back up our energy.

In America, it is believed that most people are extroverts, but studies say it's pretty much 50-50. So how do we end up with 75% being considered extroverts?
"What may seem surprising for some since Americans are thought to be very extroverted, but truth is that the culture simply values extroversion over introversion. However, the value of extroversion over introversion doesn't make extroversion more prevalent. It just pressures people who fall on the introversion side of the spectrum to act more extroverted, while true extroverts get positive reinforcement from the culture that their temperament is the default." Chloe Shani Malveaux 
In a culture that makes you feel guilty or less successful, when you need a lot of alone time, it can be hard to live true to what you know you need. People force themselves into activities because that is praised-- often leading to stress and even health problems. 

"To thine own self be true," wrote Shakespeare. It should be accompanied by know yourself-- even if it's not popular.

I believe it's important to not only accept our own needs, as to from where our energy comes but also respect the way others are. One isn't right and the other wrong. They just are. If an introvert is married to an extrovert, that can create some problems although when two introverts get together, they may never come out of their cave.

Saturday, more coming on introverts and writing.

8 comments:

robin andrea said...

I am definitely an introvert too. I especially related to this: Introverts get their energy from being alone. They need to recharge after time in groups. And, it's true about two introverts hardly ever venturing out of their cave.

Wally Blue said...

I'm an introvert married to an extrovert with a positive outcome. Dorothy's extroversion pulls me into social activity that prevents me from becoming a complete hermit.

Celia said...

This rings true for me, an introvert from a family of primarily not-shy introverts. I'm sure that's why when I was working I chose professions where much of my work was done alone but still required some thorough interactions with others to get it done correctly that I enjoyed. What strikes me as funny is what a yakker I am in lines in the grocery and post office especially, with the clerks too if they want to talk. And I hear the most interesting things. One of my sons though is both an introvert and quite shy. He's an artist which doesn't make selling his art any easier.

Rain Trueax said...

Introverts can learn and get up in front of people and talk. I've done it too. It is that alone time though that we better get somewhere along the line or we are in trouble.

Celia, your son will have to learn to get his work seen as it sure is the requirement. That or get someone else to do it for him.

Tabor said...

I was a drama minor in college and loved it, but I am in introvert, so it was pretty challenging. I also liked my debate classes. My husband is an extrovert and must see someone or talk to someone almost every day. I can hide out for most of the week and be just fine.

Rain Trueax said...

An introvert can get in front of people to speak. I was an education major which meant lectures and debate classes, but that's where not being shy comes in. The introvert though can do that but then needs to get away for time alone while the extrovert doing the same lecture would want a party afterward.

joared said...

Truly is important we know ourselves for how else can we be true as you so aptly note. I can certainly appreciate some artists, writers or others, might not enjoy the process required, especially in today's world, to promote their creation. If I was anxious to get back to writing, or simply wanted a mind-break away from it all before starting a new venture, I think I'd want someone else to take over the publicizing and sales. However, publishing for many years now seems to require the writer to do it all themselves. Sounds like you're going to be busy with all the groups and hope you can enjoy them however shy, or not, feeling introverted or extroverted in any situation or group.

Rain Trueax said...

thank you :). I think the promoting has ended up being the challenge that I see as offering me something new. Writing I always did but I didn't care if I got them out anywhere. So the new thing is figuring out what kinds of promotions work for me. I know spamming doesn't lol