October gifts

This has been a particularly beautiful fall in the Pacific Northwest. Due to rain at the wrong time or depending on frost dates, ours vary for how bright the colors are. It and something else reminded me of another autumn in 1966. I had been living in Arizona but returned back to Oregon in late summer to await the birth of my first child in October. I remember how vivid the colors were that fall also. I still have some of those photos from sitting along the Willamette River, the autumn colors intense and me very pregnant with what would soon be revealed as a healthy girl baby, another Libra (me too).

This week-end, as I walked in the nearby town, once again admiring the spectacular foliage, along the same river, my mind was running through a mix of thoughts. As usual the sidewalk was full of people out walking along the river chattering about their lives, their concerns. I thought how ironic life can be. While some are light hearted, others are going through life changing events. It was not surprising I'd be philosophical because our daughter-in-law was in labor. New life was about to enter the world, and I was both joyful about it and stressing.

This is our son and daughter-in-law's second child and normally, I think, you'd worry a bit less with the second one, but their first son had been delivered via C-section. He was breech and there was no convincing that baby to get into proper position despite all attempts-- orthodox and otherwise. The important part was he was healthy and has been a delightful little boy-- if still strong-willed (no idea where he'd get that since everybody in his family is likewise).

This time though her plan was she would have their baby VBAC, which means vaginal birth after a cesarean, because this baby was in the right position. Our daughter-in-law was a prime candidate for successfully delivering after a cesarean. They had hired a birthing coach and her doctor was fully with them to do this. It had been three and one half years. She is healthy, strong, mentally balanced, had good medical care the first time, and does yoga regularly-- during her pregnancy yoga designed to help the process.

I trusted their wisdom on their choice, even though a nurse friend, who sees all the things that can go wrong, had informed me of some of them. Finally I decided to do some of my own research online. While I had understood things change, I also knew that when I had had my babies, this would not have been an option.

Surgical techniques have improved and more parents are choosing what my son and daughter-in-law did (although still not a majority). There are serious complications in only .5 to 1% of VBACs. There are many advantages for the baby as well as a faster recovery for the mother if she can birth her baby without surgery.

I did worry some still because, as I told our grandson, when he was with us Sunday and he wanted to race ahead on the sidewalk-- nope, hold my hand around traffic, because this grandma does worry. He looked up at me with those wide innocent (when they aren't twinkling with mischief) three year old eyes and said-- why?

What a totally wonderful age three is. There are so many whys in the world and it's fun to be around children as they learn about their world. You don't want to unnecessarily fill them with your fears; so you have to find a way to explain the why without adding fear to the mix-- just because it's how this grandma is was as good as he got Sunday-- plus carefully taking him across the lawn to the edge of the river where he could look at how far down the bluff was if someone fell over it. Always best to show someone why-- when it's possible.

So this week-end, I stressed some, after all extremely low risk or not, sometimes things go wrong and I didn't want this to go wrong. I love my daughter-in-law and wanted her and my son, who was right there for her all through the birthing process, to have a healthy baby. I smiled and kept confident for our grandson that all would be great-- as I believed it would. He had been well prepared for all of this and was very brave and excited about his brother soon to be where he could hold him.

After a tough and also blessed week-end, there is a new Libra in our family. Liam, with a full head of black hair, was born late Sunday afternoon. He weighed 8 lbs 2 oz., was 21 1/4" long, is healthy, and nursed well from birth.

Monday morning, in the hospital but due to go home that afternoon, our daughter-in-law looked beautiful holding her newest son (as always I do not post photos of recognizable family members so you just have to take my word that she was lovely, vibrant and very happy). Hey, she even offered to let me hold him. Can you tell that made me very happy too? *s*

It has been a spectacularly beautiful October.