Our beliefs impact what we do, but how many times do we stop to even think what they are? Even the religious ones often are listed off in a well-rehearsed litany without considering where that kind of belief leads. Beliefs about ourselves, as well as the unspoken, sometimes unacknowledged ones about the world and how it operates, might seem invisible but their results are not.
Beliefs, perhaps taught us by a parent-- that we are stupid, ugly, have bad luck, or that poverty could overcome us at any time-- lead to one kind of life view. Likewise if we had family who said we were beautiful, smart and can do anything to which we set our minds, it's what we expect until or unless life knocks us alongside the head to force a reevaluation. I think most of us tweak our beliefs about ourselves, life and relationships as we go through various experiences although some keep those first core beliefs intact for a lifetime.
After my conversation with my friend, I started writing down what I saw as my basic beliefs at 64 years of age. The easiest were my world view. The hardest are who I see myself as being. Whenever one would come to my mind, I'd write it in my journal. I am sure I don't have them all yet, but thought I'd share a couple to illustrate the general idea.
This is a busy season for doing such an evaluation, although if you do it as I have, write them down as they come to you, it's not that time consuming. Some of our hidden beliefs about the world and ourselves might be sabotaging our goals. When we bring to them to the surface, we can deal with them.
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Believing something does not make it so. Disbelieving it won't make it go away-- likewise saying it out loud won't make it happen.
Everything has a price of one sort or another attached-- even what appears to be free. Know what it is before accepting anything.
Do not dwell on the past or the future, while the moment goes sailing by, because the moment is all there is.
Be kind whenever possible. Kindness, even the small sort like a friendly smile for a stranger, is its own reward.
I see myself as still being that country-living, glasses-wearing, geeky little girl and believe I will be even when I am very, very old.
Believing something does not make it so. Disbelieving it won't make it go away-- likewise saying it out loud won't make it happen.
Everything has a price of one sort or another attached-- even what appears to be free. Know what it is before accepting anything.
Do not dwell on the past or the future, while the moment goes sailing by, because the moment is all there is.
Be kind whenever possible. Kindness, even the small sort like a friendly smile for a stranger, is its own reward.
I see myself as still being that country-living, glasses-wearing, geeky little girl and believe I will be even when I am very, very old.
6 comments:
Great post, Rain and great thoughts to ponder.
For me, I often evaluate and think back to my teens and early 20's and see how much my core beliefs have changed. I'd like to think for the better.
I trust less, love more, work harder and resonate strongly with the authentic.
Terri
http://www.islandwriter.net
Very good post. It got me to thinking too. I don't think my core beliefs have changed much. But how I approach life and respond to others has changed. I too trust less and love more. But I think maybe I do not work harder, but have settled into a comfortable groove, which is still pretty hard working most of the time, but work does not dominate my life. Quality time with family and friends has taken on a much larger role in my life than it used to. Now if I don't get a promotion or a choice work assignment I know another one will be along soon enough.
Dear Rain - My name is Rabon and I discovered you through Time Goes By. I read and enjoyed you and would like to share this poem just in case you’re not familiar with it. With Care.
Kindness -
Before you know what kindness really is,
you must lose things, feel the future dissolve
in a moment like salt in a weakened broth.
What you held in your hand, what you counted
and carefully saved, all this must go
so you know how desolate the land scape can be
between the regions of kindness.
How you ride and ride, thinking the bus will never stop,
the passengers eating maize and chicken
will stare out the window forever.
Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness,
you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho
lies dead by the side of the road.
You must see how this could be you,
how he too was someone who journeyed
through the night with plans
and the simple breath that kept him alive.
Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside,
you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing.
You must wake up with sorrow.
You must speak to it till your voice catches
the thread of all sorrows and you see the size of the cloth.
Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore,
only kindness that ties your shoes and sends you out
into the day to mail letters and purchase bread,
only kindness that raises its head from the crowd of the world
to say it is I you have been looking for, and then goes with you
every where like a shadow or a friend.
- Naomi Shihab Nye
Some of my core beliefs are:
1)Simplicity is superior to complexity.
2)If I have something I value, I feel very light when I give it away.
3)Education is life long.
4)I am an artist.
5)I am a clutter buster.
6)I change but I come to see I have not changed as much as I thought I might.
I'll have to think about that for awhile and right now there is too much going on to spend much time thinking. I do know that I finally came to realize that chasing the all-mighty dollar was a waste of time and that time is what's really valuable in life. Once you have enough dollars it is foolish to continue wasting time striving for more. What will you do, take them to your grave with you? No! Retire when you can and start enjoying your remaining time.
Yes, a lot to think about, Rain. My school, along with the mission statement and strategic plan, has 5 core values which took several people a long time to come up with.
I may try writing about this--when I have a little more time. I liked the core beliefs you have listed so far and your last one especially resonates with me.
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