Paths of Life

 Paths of Life from Arizona State Museum

It's hard to believe we have been in Tucson just over three weeks and have to start home. If I had my druthers, I'd spend a lot longer here as I really love this house and the desert around it. The weather has been in the 70s-- which isn't always the case for January in Tucson.

There were so many things I thought I'd be doing while here, but the house had to be the priority. I ended up having a lot of my own editing to do. We had some house repairs, things to replace, and basically will be leaving Casa Espiritu in great shape for the first renters.

So Sunday we hook up the trailer; us and the cats, who will hate traveling again, start the journey north. I am uncertain how long it will take as that all depends on the weather. Right now it's looking like it should be fine for roads.

One of the things I most wanted to do while here was visit the Arizona Historical Museum and the Arizona State Museum on the UofA campus. Being there brought back wonderful memories of when Farm Boss was getting his Master's, but also when our kids came with us on vacations in the years after that.

There used to be a small cafe in that area where we got ice cream cones. It was where I first heard Danny's Song. Just to hear that song now makes me all teary because I knew then it was my life. I was hearing a guy singing about what I was living.

During those years we came south with a 15' vacation trailer, no air conditioning and a porta-potty in a closet. It was usually May or later (had to work around school) and to get cooled off, we used spray bottles of water and wet towels.

Once in Tucson, we stayed in trailer parks off Miracle Mile, which I have to say even then wasn't exactly a high class neighborhood. One had a small lake with ducks (education on duck sexual practices). The other had a rougher clientele, including some who looked like they were part of Hells Angels (fortunately no education). Any such place had to have a swimming pool.

Those were good years. I am glad I knew it when I was living them.

first photo Tucson Mountain Park-- second Lake Powell

Tucson has a ton of memories attached from my first time here in 1965 until this last time as we again head north.Yes, I love Arizona.

My guest blogger-- Jim Roberts on doing a radio show

Until my 50th high school reunion came along, I'd never gone to any of them. That one though seemed significant, and Farm Boss and I attended his and mine. What I liked about doing it wasn't so much the reunion, which was fine; but it was reconnecting with friends from those years, some I'd known since childhood. In my mind, they were all still 18 until that September. To now see them as my age was very cool.

 One of those was Jim Roberts. When I was a kid, with my mom, brother, and the neighbors, I picked beans and berries on the Roberts' farm. I have very vivid memories of being between the tall bean rows, eating a warm sack lunch when the break came, getting the beans weighed for how much I'd be making toward school clothes.

Jim and his wife Sally

At the reunion, I reconnected with several friends on Facebook and Jim was one. When I found out what he's been doing, I asked him to write a guest blog here because I thought others might find how public radio works and who does these shows to be of interest.

As a side note, it is also interesting what we can do, in our senior years, when the world might think we should be playing Bingo or sitting home watching TV. The following is from Jim:

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Will start by saying I've known you since we were kids in the same grade and riding the same school bus.  You were really quiet and studious and I was sort of the opposite!  Fifty years later I see you at the first hi school reunion I'd ever attended and then connected through the magic of face book.

Don't know if this is pertinent, but I have had a life long love of radio as a means of learning things and enjoying music.  I remember being a little kid listening to my dad being interviewed on a Portland radio station that had something to do with farming.  Blessed to not have a TV until maybe a junior in hi school so consequently listened to radio and read.  Same stuff I do to this day with the recent increase with radio involvement.

We haven't had a TV since 1990 so know virtually nothing about of the current menu on the tube.  Stumbled across KMUN shortly after moving to Wahkiakum county from Anchorage.  Had just retired from 19 years as a staff RN at Providence Alaska Medical Center.

My wife Sally and I arrived to the Columbia-Pacific in February, 2010.  First thing that caught our ears was The Ship Report at 8:49 each weekday morning unless it's in 'dry dock', as the host and station manager Joanne Rideout describes.  NPR news and local interest programs mornings and evenings interspersed with local news covering Oregon and Washington issues.  And then the music starts.  Folk of one sort or another weekdays 10-noon followed by Fresh Air and then, depending on the day, will be two or three hours of music.

 I was listening Joey's Blues in the Afternoon on a Monday afternoon in September of 2012 when he announced that KMUN was looking to train new programmers and to call the station if interested.  He hadn't hung up yet and I was on the phone!

Shortly an application arrived in the mail and ultimate acceptance into the class of 5 that met five consecutive Wednesdays from 4-5:30. Elizabeth Menetrey is the program director and taught us well.  At the end of the five weeks each person had to produce a five minute show with a beginning, two sets with snippets of three tunes in each with a station break between and then an ending to the 'show'.

A committee then decides if you are good to go on air. I was paired with Todd Lippold on a Saturday noon-2:00 show called Cross Road.  I remember the date, 11/10/2012 as it coincides with the Marine Corps birthday.

Since then have hosted a variety of shows including Lost Highway, Blues in the Afternoon, both on Mondays with regular hosts John Stevenson and Joe Patenaude, Cross Roads, Stuck in the Sixties and the Saturday night party from 8-10.

This all leads to the recent major winter storm here with huge wind gusts and lots of rain.  I was enjoying the 50 mile drive from Cathlamet to Astoria to do the Saturday night show which I call The 420 Club/Trippin' with Jimmy when I host it.

I was about half way across the Megler bridge and listening to KMUN programmer Ellen playing her music on the Shady Grove program when there was white noise for less than a minute before the signal was back. Arrived at the Tillicum house studio with my box of CD's for my program and found that another programmer, Suzy McCleary, had already talked to Ellen. She asked me to call our engineer Terry Wilson and find out what happened.

Turned out that Coast Radio was the only signal going out in the local area.  Both TV and radio stations had lost power and were just gone.  The true beauty of our community radio is that it's all volunteer programmers and community supported.  This is why we have the pledge drives and have a propane fired generator which allows us to broadcast even when all else has failed.  People do call with updates on what is happening where they live.

Terry had just left the air room after announcing that power had been restored to a particular area and a person called and said not so.  That's why we do this and this is part of stated objective of serving our community; Ask any of the other programmers and get the same answer.  It's one of the most fun things a person can do is to be on the radio.  Knowing that the entire planet most likely isn't listening to you and your music but also knowing they could is really cool.

Being able to play music recorded by friends of mine in addition to music Sally and I have collected over our 25 years is also really cool.  But the very coolest thing of all is to be a part of this truly amazing family and endeavor we call Coast Radio.

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And for me besides hearing an old friend on the radio, here is the cool part-- you can listen to this music and station from anywhere in the US. When I went on the trip down here to Tucson, all I had to do was click on the link and there it was coming through my computer. To hear music a friend has chosen, the kind you might not hear elsewhere, then it's on a station that is not tied to corporate masters, that's worth protecting, don't you think?

KMUN 

An Arizona Sunset

There is nothing more musical than a sunset. He who feels what he sees will find no more beautiful example of development in all that book which, alas, musicians read but too little-- the book of Nature.

Claude Debussy

When you follow a sunset from its beginning to the end, it is like music. The sky keeps changing and going from pastels to intense colors and then finally fading to dark gray and then black for nightfall. It is when you want to have Grofé Grand Canyon Suite playing on the stereo.

Life isn't always tidy

Looking at my list of books sold January 1, where I expected to find a gold bar, which is what you see until a sale appears (I mean sales were good -- for me anyway in December-- with a few much appreciated reviews where people told me, sometimes in emails, how much they enjoyed my books, a sale already was unlikely. I both laughed and growled when I saw why no gold bar.

My bet is the same person who stole 11 of my books in December came back December 28th, ordered one of the two books they hadn't already gotten, waited a couple of days and then asked for the refund. Hence [-1] is what showed up to start off January. I bet it won't be long and they'll have the last one also. Wonder if they will come back for new arrivals. The thefts have been a thorn in my side-- mainly because Amazon lets it happen.

The policy in Amazon is you can get a total refund of any purchase without giving a reason if you ask for it within 7 days. So any reader can order an eBook, read it, or just stash it on their computer and then ask for the refund even if they loved the book. There is no way Amazon can track it down and take it back. They ask no questions nor currently appear to look at how many returns a person has had. Although someone might use different email accounts, it could be tracked -- if Amazon cared.

Basically as one friend said, this kind of thing happens with those who go into a store, buy a big screen TV, watch the Super Bowl, and then return the TV the next day. In their case though they stole usage of the TV or the dress they wore to a big party. The item is returned. It's all dishonest, but in the case of the eBooks, it enables total theft. 

It's been said that you only really know if you are an honest person if you will steal when you know you can get away with it. Amazon is making that possible with their policy most especially where it comes to Kindles. If they only stole the books to read, that's one thing. Not good as it establishes a habit of taking whatever one feels they can get away with but there is another possibility for the thefts.

Some take those books for pirate sites where they give them away, resell them or alter a few words and claim them for their own. Amazon cooperates with that happening and mostly because what's an indie writer to them? What's a theft to them? They might care if it happens to the big publishing houses at the rate with which it happened to me.

It's funny because I give away books. I gave away thousands when I began putting out the eBooks. It was a way to get seen.  It feels different when they are stolen-- partly because it means a dishonest person has that book. If someone is willing to steal to get them, might they do other dishonest things with them?

I had been debating bringing out my Oregon historicals. They wouldn't have been first in 2014 in any case as I have a paranormal novella set for February 1st and a short story in an anthology of western romance writers for the middle of March; but when I do, I am pretty well decided to bring them out only as paperbacks and maybe not even list them on Amazon where they aren't likely to sell many or any. Right now I trust them no more than I do the person who stole the books. They are helping that individual go down a path that may lead to worse. All of life is that way. Actions lead to consequences. When the consequence is it worked, what does that teach?

Every book I write is about that issue of actions --> consequences. I wish I had a way to have the books out there with a company that cared about that philosophy.

The photo is from a path at the trailhead in Catalina State Park. It heads out with signs that clearly state where it's possible to go. Life isn't always so tidy.

happy new year

I am soooo glad to be leaving 2013 behind and feel good about starting into a new year. I know years and months are only accounting devices, but it does seem as though it marks an end and beginning-- maybe only because I grew up where it does on a lot of physical levels.

We will begin our new year at our Tucson home with a lot of things needed to prepare it for the first of its seasonal renters coming after we leave at the end of January. A lot of little and some bigger things go wrong with a home especially an older one. It is nice for us to be able to do this when here even if it's being hired done.

To get here, we pulled our vacation trailer down the middle of California. Even with shorter driving days, it was unpleasant to say the least. I-5 in California is not well maintained with lots of uneven portions and bad patches. We hardly saw a patrol car the whole time going south, and they closed several of their rest areas which made me think it's budget cuts. Of course, I am guessing.

Lots and lots of traffic heading toward LA with a lot of nuttiness which is multiplied when it's that many cars. Then a windstorm with 40-50 mph gusts between Barstow, CA and Bouse, AZ two of our overnight stays. For the nighttime stops, the trailer was far better than motels, nice RV parks all the way (finding a Good Sam is a tip for well-maintained sites just off the freeways). Anyway we are here. Hopefully by the time we start home we'll be recovered from this drive enough to do it all again ;)

Anyway I am excited about entering the new year from Tucson, one of my favorite places in the West. It was great to be here last night, and the cats will eventually forgive us for taking them. One of them has to learn to stay off tables... Guess which.

 For those interested in astrology, 2014 begins with a new moon, rather unusual; but nobody is saying hugely significant. I get emails that go into what is expected, and I thought others might find [this one interesting]. It was forwarded from Stephanie St. Claire a Tucson psychic who I met some years back.  I think they are fun to read for the energy to be expected based on planetary influence (or natural cycles). I don't base my life choices on astrology but in this case, I am feeling this is going to be a good year ahead.

Reviewing a year

As we approach the end of a year, always a momentous time in my mind (even as a calendar is a man-made way to keep track), I have a wonderful calendar from last year where I sometimes would put the quotes on here. As a review of 2013, here they all are.

If we can let go for just a moment, relax, and fall into the center of now, we can encounter directly the freedom that we've all been seeking.

Adyashanti

This is our choice in every moment. Do we relate to our circumstances with bitterness or openness?

Pem Chodron

You are not "in the now"-- You are the now. This is your essential identity-- the only thing that never changes. Life is always now. Now is consciousness. And consciousness is who you are. That's the equation.

Eckhart Tolle

Anything and everything can become our teacher of the moment, reminding us of the possibility of being full present: the gentle caress of air on our skin, the play of light, the look on someone's face. Anything and everything-- if it is met with awareness.

Jon Kabat-Zinn

The reasons of the heart are leaves in the wind. Stand up tall and everything will nest in you.

Mark Nepo

Walk and touch peace in every moment. Walk and touch happiness every moment. Each step brings a fresh breeze. Each step makes a flower bloom under our feet.

Thich Nhat Nanh

Joy is the means and the end.

Michael Bernard Beckwith

No matter what situation we find ourselves in, we can always set our compass to our highest intentions in the present moment.

Jack Kornfield

I will approach eadh day knowing that those who have gone before me are watching, and those who come after me will reap what I do with that day.

Joseph Marshall

Close the language-door and open the love window. The moon won't use the door, only the window.

Rumi

There are three medicines that you should put in your medicine bundle every day: the power of acknowledgement and gratitude, genuine apology, and the spirit of laughter and joy.

Angeles Arrien

Behold the children, and imitate them... They are interested in the present moment, in being curious and in learning, in showing and in sharing, in making and creating.

Clarissa Pinkola Estes, PHD

These all came from my calendar for 2013 by Sounds True called The Present Moment embracing the fullness of life. I bought the same type of calendar for above my desk for 2014.

it's snowing right where I like it

Another Google+ treat using our recent snow and the cattle. Fun stuff.

Merry Christmas

Happy Solstice and Merry Christmas

This is a big moment for many of us as we finally come to the shortest day of the year, the longest night, and from now on our days are slowly going to grow in light. Many mark the day with yule logs and a bringing back of the light celebrations which might involve candles.

This is such a crazy, hectic time that it can be difficult to take time to reflect. Colds and flu are everywhere.  For me, Solstice is a good time to look at my previous year and ahead to the one coming. We made it over the hump once again. There are many potential rituals attached to that from Celtic days. Solstices are the real turning points-- not our end of the calendar year which is neat but is artificially put together for accounting more than any real biological event.

For me a lot of difficult things came down since my last Winter Solstice which I had celebrated in Tucson. I am looking for the coming year to be better-- I hope. I lost two much beloved cats from our fur family, when I rarely lose one over many years. One, a young cat, was a particularly tough loss that still hurts if I let myself think about it.

My health has had some tests which led to no more gluten or dairy (that makes eating complicated let me tell you). Then came a recent painful facial and ear condition which maybe is diagnosed or maybe not but it didn't feel good. These aren't big things by many standards, but they aren't fun either. I can know I am a lucky woman on a ton of standards, but I also am a woman who will be glad to see this year behind me.

To show some of the good things in my year, I went through 2013 photos for some of my favorites-- excluding, of course, any of the family. These are from big to small moments where each brings back good memories.

One thing I've learned in my now just over 70 years of life-- the best moments in my life aren't the big, exciting ones but instead the small, still ones. The little accomplishments. The lucky times I see something I'd never seen before. Even the sad moments. I can't hold any of them. Some I just want to get through as fast as possible.

Photography is about capturing a moment in a different way so it can be pulled back and the feelings surge over you with the memories. For me, the lesson is you can't hold back life. Life goes on, and we are left to savor memories from special times, enjoy what is right in front of us, and look to what is ahead.

snow on the farm

We had some snow in our valley with temperatures that dipped below 0ºF. It will lead to loss of shrubs when we figure out what damage was done as it's been over 40 years since it last got that cold here.

The snow did yield some pretty photos. I wasn't out much in it due to a sensitive ear, but Farm Boss had to feed; so got some good photos. I am not much of a snow person anymore. A day or two and I'm ready to see it be gone.

It was Raven's first time to see snow and that was fun to watch. Neither she nor Blackie thought much of such low temperatures for their paws. Their time outside usually was just long enough to turn around and come back in.

Surprisingly she is a cat who likes to watch the television and gets right up there as though trying to figure out from where that image is coming. I don't think she can get up on the TV and knock it over but will be glad when she is less fascinated.