After years of having mixed feelings about how I looked (more on that below), when I turned 80, when I looked in the mirror-- oh my gosh how did that happen? Ithink because of my skin type, I hadn't earlier needed moisturizers, etc. Except, did ignoring all of that end up where I was in that mirror.
To be honest, I had been told most of my life that I looked pretty good. You know how that can be-- others say one thing about your looks, but you see another. As a child, well, that photo at the top was me in 7th grade where I had no idea how to dress, wear my hair, or do makeup. There are more awkward photos from childhood years.
By the time I got into high school, the toughness of my school for kids dressing well, I had to work on caring and accomplished a lot of it through second-hand stores. If children wear makeup too early or sexy clothes, it's not good to many. But to have no clue what is attractive, that also is not good. Plus, there were so many standards back then for length of hems, and you absolutely could not wear pants to school.
Here I am today, when I began to not only think--- eek, but also what am I trying to do here? Look younger? I was definitely not at my best at 18. I used to say most women reach their best at 35, but now I think it's in their 50s, when they have maturity added to their features. This though again, is for women who have interest in such and many do not. Bless them!
As for this business of surgery, it's definitely about trying to look younger. Frankly, it doesn't work for most. They just look plastic. They lose out on what mature beauty might appear to be. Can we let go of a youthful look and find other ways to feel good about our physical looks?
I don't even know what hairstyle is supposed to be youthful. It's been a long time since I've cared. When I was in my mid20s, I was at a stylist to have my hair trimmed and he said no woman should wear it long ... past 30.
Over my many years, I've varied the length of mine but never short since high school. Pixies look cute on some women. I don't think they would so much on me but it's not the reason I wear mine so long.
To begin, I let mine grow long in my 70s-80s, was curiosity. I wondered if I could. I enjoy the feel of long hair on my back, I cut it myself with long layers. I have gone to salons for perms but frankly, retired as we are, cost is a factor in not doing it. I've never had a pedicure or manicure, but that's personal preference to not liking my nails colored because, if you are an active woman, they constantly require maintenance. I used to do some polish at home before my tremors got so bad. Like, how many places to I want that color to end up???
Another thing, a woman whose blog I read, said one of her commenters said she should not wear jeans. That is just ridiculous to me-- wear the clothes that suit your interest as why do most of us have a reason to be high-styling, even if we could afford it. Does that make someone seem more attractive? I can give a few names where it doesn't in the celeb world, but I won't.
After I saw some recent photos of me, most taken with bad lighting, too many shadows, and bright sun (that's an excuse but not a good enough one) I got interested in some simple things to try and improve my elderly skin, things that are not that expensive or invasive; since I am not trying to turn back time. Still, keeping my skin healthy looking with less droopiness, bags, or big lines, well, I am into that. If you see me making weird faces, they are facial exercises :). which help a lot to keep a chin and neck from losing it.
Some of what I am trying are like facial peels, which is supposed to encourage the skin layers and encourage collagen development . Exercises help with the muscles under the skin. Everything I use can be in the home. I don't have the money or interest in expensive answers.
To me, the big thing is being able to see someone is old, but that they still have beauty. The alternative is surgery or maybe Botox, which I don't trust any more than I would Ozempic for weight loss. Humans always seem to want the easy answer. I suspect, given side effects, there is no easy answer for any of it.
Just had a ton of photos taken by Ranch Boss to get my Passport renewed with a current picture, but it kept getting refused for an online renewal. The one they finally accepted was an eyeopener for saying-- I don't care. By the time, we had success, smiling was no longer happening, and frankly, smiles improve looks a lot!
When you see that many photos of yourself, necessarily without photo-shop (Passport claims they can tell), it really makes you SEE yourself and in ways you'd rather not, generally speaking. It led to my interest in having beauty be a topic here. Why do we care about it? Should we care about it? Worse though, to me, is should we care about youthful looks? That one I know we should not but how to get past it in a world that makes so much of it? It's all up to us in our own lives. I know that much as the celeb and advertising worlds won't let go of it.
Repeating-- here's the thing I'd like to have Americans and really people around the world be able to see-- women,who look old, can at the same time appear lovely to us. And not just to be polite, but genuinely see the two things can go together. As it is, all the goals to increase beauty appear to try to send it back to the woman's 20s, which by the way, are not women's most attractive years, at least for most of us. Cute works better for me where it comes to young women. It takes some maturity to create what I consider beautiful in a woman.
As a writer, what was frustrating is the need to create a cover with a beautiful older woman. It takes a lot of searching. I like writing about elders showing that romance can still happen. but there need to be more images available to buy if there are to be people on those covers. I finally did it by finding a head one place and an historical garment another for a new creation. Fun to do actually, but I'd love it if some of these models, as they age, could continue being out there. The world is not just made up of young people doing things.
As I said in the earlier blog, this appears a bit easier for men to be considered old but still good looking-- although I also had to buy one man's head and another body for one of the covers. Of course, maybe the companies know only the young ones get bought. This whole thing might be more a thing of society than in ourselves. Looking old should not be negative but rather just part of a long-lived life, and it should not require surgery...
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