Another day another dime.

 Well,

we can't say another penny as the fed will stop making them. Does that make the many we already have worth more money someday? Probably not unless they have the right images.

My writing on what's happening globally is no better today than last week. The killing in Minneapolis has as much confusing info on it as before. So the victim has four wounds, one in the head from shot through windshield, but one hole through the windshield, not four. Others were in her chest and arm. Who shot those? There are also claims that he has internal injuries from being hit with her vehicle. What makes sense to each side might depend on where they came from in terms of partisan hacks-- either side.

Greenland seems wrong to attack but is it part of global change with new and old enemies changing constantly. Iran-- bad however you look at it. WWIII-- is it on the horizon? I hope not but so much is out of our control, but maybe not what will hurt us.

My own life had multiple problems this week from one of our beloved cats developing a limp that meant she hopped to avoid stepping on one leg. After a veterinary visit and multiple x-rays (plus reducing our bank account), there is no firm answer, but she is getting old. She came to us a stray 9 years ago. We have no idea how old she was.  She is though, much beloved for so many reasons, and we do what we can to keep her as long as possible along with the two others, with maybe a future decision to adopt to have four cats... (fingers crossed on that one).

Then, there is the farm where one of our beloved big old white oaks split off part of it to damage the home roof, destroy the chimney and send one of the broken branches down two feet. Now, that's scary. Insurance is starting to deal with it (maybe) that but doesn't make it less stressful.

Didn't they used to say another day another dollar? I don't think so anymore. 

difficult times

 For me, this is a bad time to write what I feel. I do not know all the facts of many recent happenings; but feeling, I do know that. However, might that change when more facts come out. That's the problem with writing in such a time. Besides, not knowing, I do not want to write what will doubtless upset others. Reading the newspapers does enough of that. I might write about it all someday, when more is known, but not today.

So, I dove into my archives for things I had written years ago, like in 2005. I still very much relate to this feeling for today as a way to get through difficult times. Some say, live in the moment. I also believe that, but my memories are always also part of me today.

Before that, is this quote by Mary Oliver, known by many but always worth remembering.

"“Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your wild and precious life."

 

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I have this yearning right now to be where the sky is big, the land open and not blemished by man's touch-- needful as that touch sometimes is. I'd like to smell the sage, feel the prairie wind in my hair. I'd like to forget for a moment that I am who I am and just be one with the earth. Be where the sky becomes as important or more so than the land beneath, where it speaks to you with gentle or fierce voices and you know somehow that whatever is troubling you is less important than you thought.

The closest I can get to that at the moment though is looking through my pictures, remembering the times in the Big Sky country and listening to the soundtrack to Legends of the Fall.

I am lucky the memories linger in my head. I sometimes think we only do things to have the memories become part of us, that the doing is not more important than the lingering effect on our souls. Some say live in the moment but the moment is part and parcel of all we have been and done. It's not just what we see in front of us but all that lingers within and that we can see when we close our eyes. The moment can likely never be as big as the memories we take away with us and can call back whenever we need to refresh our souls and be somewhere meaningful with someone we love.

So for just a moment I am not sitting at my keyboard but am instead at a trailhead in the Absaroka Mountains and I feel the edginess of knowing the unknown lies ahead. Might a grizzly be down the trail? A big elk? or just a view that will make me catch my breath?

A new year-- according to one calendar.

 Do you make resolutions for a calendar new year? I had some years, maybe from my 50s or thereabouts where I'd do goal statements.  I'd break them into spiritual, physical and emotional. After a few years of that I realized I wasn't changing any of it. Time to think but not write anything down.