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Thursday, January 25, 2007

superficial impressions

Most of us do it, whether we admit to it or not, form instant opinions about people when we first see them. If we have lived awhile, we realize those instant assessments are often wrong; and we try to limit how much we let it impact our openness to getting to know the person and finding out the looks weren't the package.

People meet a beautiful woman and assume she's stuck on herself and spends too much time in front of a mirror or a homely woman and assume she will have a more loving personality and not spend much time on beauty care. Blondes are supposed to be less intelligent, brunettes more so. Does that make any sense-- unless peroxide leaches out brain cells! Superficial, quick judgements about people, regarding what kind of personality will go with their looks, are usually wrong, but...

One of my own instant impressions regards mustaches. I really like them-- and the older the man is, the more appealing I find it. I have no idea why I would feel so strongly about it; except, I took a test awhile back that rated our feminine vs masculine tendencies. It used our finger proportions and then had a series of questions. One of them was to look at a string of photos and see which one we preferred. We chose our own sexual preference for which sex we evaluated. For me, to a high percentage, I preferred the rougher, more masculine faces. Mustaches are definitely masculine. If a woman gets one, she usually immediately does something to remove it.

I am not as fond of beards as they cover up too much of the face, goatees are okay but what really draws my eye is a mustache. Which is rather unfortunate considering we are living in an era where mustaches are 'out' in movie stars and politicians. Could a mustached man win a major political seat?

Now in the world where I live, which is country, I do see more men with mustaches and beards. If I were to move farther into what some would say was the West (as opposed to the left coast), it would be even more so. Amen for the West!

Sure, that's a superficial reason to admire a man's face, but come on, isn't George Clooney really Clark Gable except for lack of a mustache?

It has to be a full, neatly trimmed mustache and not one of those little bitty things. I also don't find so appealing real big onesthat hide the mouth totally, go way down and curl up on the ends with mustache wax-- popular (besides as villains in silent picture days) among some wranglers in a few parts of the west.

For me, even John Wayne, who was normally clean-shaven, was sexier looking and yes-- even him-- more manly with that mustache he wore in the cavalry westerns made in Monument Valley-- Fort Apache, Rio Grande, and She Wore a Yellow ribbon.

Let's see where was I besides lamenting the fact more men don't grow mustaches today? Oh yes, superficial attractions. Is there something that is probably superficial but always catches your eye in other people?

6 comments:

Mary Lou said...

Mustaches are a thing with me too. I think that is because my Dad had one. He shaved it off when I was 7 and I was so mad!!! I ran into the bathroom to get it and put it back on him! LOLOL

as far as first superficial impressions...something that I have found myself doing (and it Shocked me) was assuming that fat women were lazy and ignorant. I have NO IDEA where that came from because I am NOT thin at all...in fact I have been morbidly obese for many years. I realized that a few years ago, and wondered if that is what people think when they see me.

I do not go for really good looking men either. ruggedly handsome is a big turn on for me...like Sam Elliott!! yum yum yum!!!

Anonymous said...

Like Mary Lou's dad, my dad had a mustache, too--a little brush one, a lot like Adolph Hitler. My former husband, who is Italian, had a huge handlebar mustach and long hair back in the 70s. Unlike Mary Lou and you, Rain, I think mustaches and beards can be attractive if they are kept up, but so many men don't keep them clean. And I will admit, when I was married or had a lover, I never enjoyed having to deal with all the facial hair. Just my hang-up.

Also, like Mary Lou, I am appalled that I have judgment about fat people and old people--and I am both. I am actually working hard at understanding this--and eliminating these character defects.

Now, I will admit that Anne Heche's love interest on "Men in Trees" is pretty darned cute in his beard.

Anonymous said...

The thing that grabbed me in your post was the section on beautiful women. I will certainly admit that when I was in my twenties, even thirties I certainly harbored some preconceived notions about good-looking women. But over the years upon hearing how very often many of these women may in fact be very lonely and men, such as myself, who perhaps lack the self-confidence or are to shy to approach them....well that has completely changed my thoughts and attitudes.

Now when I see an especially attractive woman, I immediately wonder if they are actually to some degree lonely and not as active socially as one might normally assume.

I do think that this scenario was probably more prevelant with my generation than the current. At least it would seem so.

And...I never had either a beard or a mustache. Always thought some men looked cool with theirs but didn't feel it was right for me. I also had a preconceived notion that no woman in her right mind would want to play "kissy-face" having to deal with all that facial hair. lol

Rain Trueax said...

I agree-- an unkept mustache would be about as appealing as unbrushed teeth. As for being hard to maneuver around, I haven't found it to be the case, not like someone who needed to shave and didn't. Mustaches can be quite soft-- depends on the person and their hair.

Just think of Tom Selleck without his mustache. He's made at least one film that way and it just wasn't the same. I have to agree though, that it depends on the face also. Everybody should do what looks best on them. But today with mustaches, being out as they are, even if someone would look better with one, many won't grow it because it's not been popular. I can't even think of a politician who had one and when Al Gore first came back into the public eye, he had a goatee-- which I might say looked mighty fine-- and they gave him a bad time about it in the press, said if he wanted to run for office again, he'd have to shave it. Now why are they that unpopular when they used to be something most men had??? What changed?

Diane Widler Wenzel said...

I don't know if the number of beards are fewer today. In the Jewish community there are many men who do sport mustaches and beards. When their beards are irritating and itchy to them I feel uncomfortable and distracted while talking to them. I also see facial hair when men start going bald. So I was surprised to hear that mustaches are out of style. In some professions there are dress codes which do not allow beards. When it is a safty hazard like in cooking or in a furnace it is understandable. But when it is a religious college or sales job I feel that freedom is violated.

Anonymous said...

I'm smiling....this was a good post.
My husband has had a mustache for years. I like it on him, but have to say it doesn't matter one way or the other on other men. Your area sounds like mine though. Almost ALL the men here on the island either have a mustache, beard or both. So of course when we moved here, I coaxed hubby into the beard. I really liked it, but after more than a year, I finally told him one day, "You CAN get rid of that, you know." Within an hour, it was gone....lol It was nice for awhile, but I knew it wasn't his preference.
So....what catches my eye? Men with gray/white hair.....I know, silly, huh? But it DOES.....I just think they look SO distinguished looking. Like Richard Gere. Love his hair!
But the older I get, the more I know....never judge a book by it's cover.